There is a saying that I have been thinking about A LOT lately and they are who wants to be normal.
I get that life is more interesting with free thinkers and those willing to be daring to be different that makes up the wonderful rainbow of life but the life of a parent of a special needs parents I have those days I wonder what it would be like to have a “normal” child and therefore a little more “normal” life. I think about what is that like to send your child off to school and not have to hope there are no bus incidents for the day or will there be notes sent home because of something that happened or even worse, a phone call. I wonder what it is like to send off to school if there is going to be a substitute and not have to worry or wonder if it will be a good day or enough of a change that the day that outcome is far from good.
I do wonder because almost everyday this is my worry is it going to be a good or rough day or somewhere in between. I can handle the good and in between days and the occasional rough day but alas sometimes it not just a bad day it’s more like one or two or a week of rough days. As I write this it has been almost a week of rough days and the last being rough enough I had to pick my son up from school early.
So I am once again wondering what is it like to see that your child school is calling and not have the stomach sinking feeling of “Oh no, now what” or that gut wrenching feeling when you see a note from the school and even worse when it’s a sealed envelope. I wonder what goes through non special needs parents minds with phone calls from school and notes from school.
I would like to know and when on the days I am really wishing things could be a little more “normal” I remember the blessings that I do have in all of this craziness. One being I am less judgmental when I see a kid having a fit in a store because what if it is more than a kid being a brat.
I am more patient. And I am a better teacher’s aid and once I am done with school I will be a better teacher. I know that the easy answer for behavior is not always the right or can just be a part of the answer. I also know my son will be better for it for he is learning the value of hard work and that challenges are not road blocks, just some things you have to work a little harder to bust through them.
Comments
Kareen
You are living your normal. Every day, every minute and every time that phone rings, it is your normal. Just like for your son, it is so hard to regulate our emotions and our fears. One day at a time we do. You already have found your gifts and your strengths and believe it or not, you could teach so many about what your normal feels like and they will say, “wow you too??”
Thanks for the post!
Kareen
Dawn
Wow… as I read this, I think, “did I write that”… it sure feels like deja vu to me. So… (((hugs))) because we are not alone!
Dawn
Meghann Baynon
After when, what seemed like, everything fell apart over here (JD’s first seizure and us forcing to admit to ourselves there WAS a problem), my husband cried out in frustration “I want it to be normal again!” and my response was “This is the new normal.” And this normal doesn’t suck, really. Sure some days are harder than others, but I firmly believe that we come out as better people as a result. : )
Jennifer
I love this post! I can somewhat relate when it comes to my son. My son is 7 but in different areas developmentally he is like a 2 or 3 yr old. What I’m dealing with now are the tantrums and lashing out in the store. I feel like you do…people stare and I feel like telling them to stop staring because he’s not being a brat, he has special needs. It’s very frustrating but my motto now is I’m thankful for what my son CAN do and I don’t focus too much on what he CAN’T do or his developmental delays.
Dana
Wow I was saying this same thing just yesterday Again! With all three of my kiddos, when we had to leave the 4H fair.