Murphy’s Laws of Special Needs Parenting…
child will have a meltdown at school and have to come home early.
youngest will be a sensory avoider.
for pictures, they will chew the buttons off before you get to the photographer.
office, he still won’t eat it at home.
will flood the bathroom.
up until midnight playing Legos.
house in a hurry, he will take them off before you even find your purse.
leaving the house, he will still have an accident on the way to the park.
the staircase, your child will have an hour long meltdown that you messed up
If you convince your child’s teacher to allow
your child a fidget toy, she’ll go on maternity leave.
If you make a detailed visual schedule for your
child’s first birthday party, the party plans will change.
If you take the day off of work to attend your
child’s fieldtrip, they’ll change the date.
If you have time to take a shower today, your
child will dump out the bean tub, empty the shaving cream cans and draw in
Sharpie marker all over his walls to make sure you don’t get to shower tomorrow.
If you clean your child’s room, he will insist
it now feels ‘too big’.
If you make your child’s bed, he will insist on
sleeping on the ground.
If you wash your child’s favorite stuffed animal
or blanket, he will have a meltdown because it doesn’t smell right.
If you make a special holiday dinner, your child
won’t come downstairs because of the smell.
If you hire a babysitter, your child will start
to throw up the moment you’re wearing heels.
If you buy anything with High Fructose Corn
Syrup, fake dye, or allergens of any sort, your child will find it – and eat
ALL OF IT.