One day near the end of last school year, the school nurse called. This is a typical occurrence, so I didn’t freak out. She always has at least one of our boys in her office. She said that Aidan’s Kindergarten teacher had walked him down to see her because he was inconsolable and wouldn’t tell anyone what the problem was. He was crying and distraught, but wouldn’t, or couldn’t, let anyone know how they could help him. He just kept saying he needed to come home.
I had one thing to tell the nurse– ask Aidan if his socks are bugging him. So she did that, and sure enough, I heard him sniffle “yes” on the other end of the phone. I asked to talk to him, and we sorted out the sock issue. I had made him wear socks that morning because he had gym class at school that day, and needed socks for his gym shoes. The feeling of the socks was bothering him so much that he had a total meltdown. Couldn’t concentrate. Couldn’t speak. Couldn’t function. All he could do was cry and hope someone would rescue him from the horrible feeling of his socks.
I packed Ella up and we headed to school to bring Aidan his crocs. He took his socks and shoes off, changed into his crocs, and lit up the room with an Aidan Smile. He gave me the biggest hug, and asked quietly through his remaining tears if he could come home. I said no, school was almost over, and now his feet would feel so much better that he’d be able to stay and finish the morning. He agreed that now things were right with the world, and skipped back to his classroom.
If I hadn’t known my son and his sensory issues so well, I might not have known that all that drama was just because Aidan had socks on his feet. It’s the craziest thing, how just a pair of socks can make someone go nuts. So many times, the way my kids behave is a product of their sensory system not working the way it’s supposed to. I’m always on the hunt for ways to make daily living more successful for our family; ways to calm overly sensitive nervous systems so that we can still do necessary things like flush the toilet, brush teeth, take a shower, wear jackets that are too ‘puffy’, get a haircut, visit a museum, play on the playground, endure the cafeteria at school, and sometimes…even wear socks.
Comments
Marita
Poor kid, I can not sleep in socks, I can’t relax in them either. Gotten so I can function during the day wearing socks, but I dislike them at night.
Molly
Ah, yes, the socks. My daughter is about to turn 10 and still struggles with getting them “just so” so that she can tolerate them. I’ve tried the no seam socks and flat seam socks and high socks and low socks – and I’ve come to the conclusion that it just takes time to adjust to wearing socks, no matter how they are made. Thankfully, she is allowed to wear her sandals all year at school and just brings socks/tennies for PE. Good luck, sounds like you are all over it!
Heather Finnegan
Poor guy! Glad there was a way to make it all better for him!
Jenny from the Block
Aww, so glad mama knew how to make it better! My daughter is mild on the tactile stiff, and actually she prefers socks with shoes because she does not like things getting on her feet, like wood chips or dirt. At home, she is barefoot always. My son is only 22 months, and he will not keep on shoes or socks. Takes them off the second I put them on. I wonder how he will be when older. People always look at me like I am a bad mom while he is barefoot in public, but I clean his feet as soon as we leave and it is what it is, ya know. He tolerates slippers half the time, so sometimes he will wear slippers in public.
Marcy
Got a couple of sock haters here too. Thanks to your article, I may look into how his feet are feeling when he has meltdowns of mysterious origins.
June
what a lovely mum, had I of know this years ago…. we know my grandson has SPD now but my eldest daughter has many sensory issues ‘especially socks’ and we never knew then, she is 30 now, wish we had known. x